Human Financial Advisor Horror Stories

Sounds like my wife’s ex financial planner. I warned her after meeting him once before she gave him her money but she trusted him because her dad uses him (btw her dad has less than 1% of his net worth with this guy). Took me five years of doing yearly reviews with her to finally pull the money and put in index funds.

They put her in an annuity, impossible to liquidate private reits and my favorite was summer of 2020 after qe was in full force they put a third of her money in bonds. The underperformance was insane. Had it just been 10% worse than an index fund I’d be so happy.

Does anybody else find cold calls from financial advisors extremely annoying? I have 3 accounts.

Schwab holds retirement accounts and it does what I need it to do. I use TD as a brokerage and it does what I need it to do. They fulfill their purpose and never bother me and are great. But I also have bank account w Bank of America / Merrill lynch and I get a call from them every week from a different dillhole offering me his financial services and I find it so annoying and violating bc I know what’s happening is that these back office bungoles are looking at my accounts and holdings, which is targeting me as a good call for their prospecting.

It’s like I’m paying them to upsell me on their services, which they have never actually are able to explain why I need

I’ve had initial chats with two, and met two at parties. No horror stories, but all four left me certain that I wouldn’t trust them with a penny of my money. The two I met socially gave me the strong impression they had no idea what they were doing and just parroted dubious soundbites like “you’ll never lose money in property” or “you can’t go wrong with bonds”.

One had been in agriculture before getting a job at his father-in-law’s advisory firm.

I tried to chat to them about more complex post-recession low-interest rate stuff and they kinda changed the subject and just went back to soundbites. The two I actually spoke to about getting advice, one didn’t know how to deal with crypto and promptly ghosted me, the other also appeared to lose interest once it was clear I wasn’t just gonna buy life insurance and commission products. All four did the 1980s sales-y bullshit like using my first name constantly (one of them calling me by the wrong name over and over).

So (while I know every industry has its bad apples), my own personal experience has been that 4 out of 4 had strong scammy used car salesman / estate agent vibes. So basically, they’re the last people I’d hand over money to.I manage my ~£0.5m portfolio myself.

It was once suggested to me by a “financial advisor” to cash out my 401k and reinvest it into a whole life insurance policy.