Churned and burned

Some time in the past, a “financial advisor” convinced me that I could make a lot of money trading commodities. Wrong! I figured out he was just “churning” me (putting me into and out of too many positions, just to earn the commission), and I closed the account, buy not until he lost 80% of my money in less than a year!

At one time, just after returning back from UK, I had a significant balance in my HDFC savings account. HDFC people started calling me stating that they will send a special advisor to help me get good returns - better than savings account; all free. So I invited them to meet me at my home (COVID times).

At the first instance two gentlemen came and started preaching about HDFC Life Sanchay Plus scheme. I was not interested but I did not wish to sound rude. So I told them that I will think about it and meanwhile they can send me prospectus, etc. The next week the two came back.

They first called and said that their senior, a lady, would also like to meet me to explain the plan, options, benefits, etc. They came with rather good looking lady. This is a typical ploy. There is a group of people about 3–4 who come and target you. One of them is a pretty girl/lady who will go on to explain how life is uncertain, how one must be ready for the future, how their scheme works the best, etc. This is a psychological ploy.

First you are surrounded and hounded. Then the pretty lady, without saying so, tell you how you are making a colossal mistake. They play on your fears. You don’t wish to look stupid in front of a pretty lady. So you cave in. Once again, I was not convinced. I said I didn’t need insurance plans or pension plans. I may be open to look at investment plans and retirement income plan. Again, they went (or tried to go) for the jagular. They said that this plan they were suggesting “guarantees me” income for any term that I chose - 10 years, 30 years, life. The amount is free of tax. At my death, my nominee/heir will get the full invested amount, etc. I told them - let me think.

I’ve had initial chats with two, and met two at parties. No horror stories, but all four left me certain that I wouldn’t trust them with a penny of my money. The two I met socially gave me the strong impression they had no idea what they were doing and just parroted dubious soundbites like “you’ll never lose money in property” or “you can’t go wrong with bonds”.

One had been in agriculture before getting a job at his father-in-law’s advisory firm.

I tried to chat to them about more complex post-recession low-interest rate stuff and they kinda changed the subject and just went back to soundbites. The two I actually spoke to about getting advice, one didn’t know how to deal with crypto and promptly ghosted me, the other also appeared to lose interest once it was clear I wasn’t just gonna buy life insurance and commission products. All four did the 1980s sales-y bullshit like using my first name constantly (one of them calling me by the wrong name over and over).

So (while I know every industry has its bad apples), my own personal experience has been that 4 out of 4 had strong scammy used car salesman / estate agent vibes. So basically, they’re the last people I’d hand over money to.I manage my ~£0.5m portfolio myself.