Human Financial Advisor Horror Stories

Stay away from FirstCommand! They sell themselves as "military-friendly financial advisors," but in reality they're just commissioned salespeople.

I thought I was doing the right thing as a new officer for my financial future by promptly going down to the local First Command office and signing up for their investment and life insurance products (they sponsor events on base and their "advisors" are prior military, so they must be the good guys, right?), but it took me 12 years to realize I was being taken for a giant ride.

One of the funds they had me in was so awful that when I went to liquidate it as part of transferring my assets to Vanguard, I found out that the fund had lost so much in value and so many people put in redemption requests that the fund had stopped distributions (TFCIX).

I've since moved all my assets to Vanguard, but I still have $2K in TFCIX languishing back at FirstCommand because I still can't redeem those shares to this day. Bottom line is that you can do a lot better for yourself elsewhere; don't give these guys your hard-earned money.

Does anybody else find cold calls from financial advisors extremely annoying? I have 3 accounts.

Schwab holds retirement accounts and it does what I need it to do. I use TD as a brokerage and it does what I need it to do. They fulfill their purpose and never bother me and are great. But I also have bank account w Bank of America / Merrill lynch and I get a call from them every week from a different dillhole offering me his financial services and I find it so annoying and violating bc I know what’s happening is that these back office bungoles are looking at my accounts and holdings, which is targeting me as a good call for their prospecting.

It’s like I’m paying them to upsell me on their services, which they have never actually are able to explain why I need

No horror story, they just made more money out of me than I made out of them, so in a way they taught me a useful lesson. This was back in the 90s, when we were all simpler folk.

This is the kind of guy that I don’t actually want to punch in the face; I’d rather just have a good chuckle with him. One time, I was competing with another advisor who was offering a fixed annuity as their only investment solution. They were a pure insurance agent, and apparently, that was all he could offer.

When the client chose me as their advisor over the insurance agent, they were not happy, to say the least. They were so disappointed in my client’s decision that they felt compelled to tell them (in a condescending tone) that their products had no fees, whereas mine did, and that they (my clients) were making a horrible decision.

No fees, huh? Well, yes, if you buy a fixed annuity that guarantees you 3%, you do get 3%. But for someone to use the argument that their products have no fees is ridiculous. There’s a fee for everything; there is no such thing as a free lunch.

Lesson learned: If your advisor tells you that their products have no fees, I would suggest you first prevent yourself from bursting into laughter. Then, kindly remove yourself and sprint out of their office.

Keep the case!