The “My Products Don’t Have Fees” Advisor
This is the kind of guy that I don’t actually want to punch in the face; I’d rather just have a good chuckle with him. One time, I was competing with another advisor who was offering a fixed annuity as their only investment solution. They were a pure insurance agent, and apparently, that was all he could offer.
When the client chose me as their advisor over the insurance agent, they were not happy, to say the least. They were so disappointed in my client’s decision that they felt compelled to tell them (in a condescending tone) that their products had no fees, whereas mine did, and that they (my clients) were making a horrible decision.
No fees, huh? Well, yes, if you buy a fixed annuity that guarantees you 3%, you do get 3%. But for someone to use the argument that their products have no fees is ridiculous. There’s a fee for everything; there is no such thing as a free lunch.
Lesson learned: If your advisor tells you that their products have no fees, I would suggest you first prevent yourself from bursting into laughter. Then, kindly remove yourself and sprint out of their office.
Keep the case!
Related Horror Stories
Surrounded and Pressured
At one time, just after returning back from UK, I had a significant balance in my HDFC savings account. HDFC people started calling me stating that they will send a special advisor to help me get good returns - better than savings account; all free. So I invited them to meet me at my home (COVID times).
At the first instance two gentlemen came and started preaching about HDFC Life Sanchay Plus scheme. I was not interested but I did not wish to sound rude. So I told them that I will think about it and meanwhile they can send me prospectus, etc. The next week the two came back.
They first called and said that their senior, a lady, would also like to meet me to explain the plan, options, benefits, etc. They came with rather good looking lady. This is a typical ploy. There is a group of people about 3–4 who come and target you. One of them is a pretty girl/lady who will go on to explain how life is uncertain, how one must be ready for the future, how their scheme works the best, etc. This is a psychological ploy.
First you are surrounded and hounded. Then the pretty lady, without saying so, tell you how you are making a colossal mistake. They play on your fears. You don’t wish to look stupid in front of a pretty lady. So you cave in. Once again, I was not convinced. I said I didn’t need insurance plans or pension plans. I may be open to look at investment plans and retirement income plan. Again, they went (or tried to go) for the jagular. They said that this plan they were suggesting “guarantees me” income for any term that I chose - 10 years, 30 years, life. The amount is free of tax. At my death, my nominee/heir will get the full invested amount, etc. I told them - let me think.
What does an advisor do?
Years ago when I was getting started i spoke to a Schwab advisor. After speaking with him for an hour I still couldn’t figure out what a financial advisor does.
Do you pick stocks? “No, we allocate it to a few different index funds” which funds “funds you feel comfortable that suits your risk level” so I pick the funds?? “Yes” on so then what do you do??! “I advise you, and help you with your unique needs” my unique needs??? My need is for my money to grow as fast as possible.
Do some people have the unique need to lose money?? “….”
Financial advisors are very annoying
Does anybody else find cold calls from financial advisors extremely annoying? I have 3 accounts.
Schwab holds retirement accounts and it does what I need it to do. I use TD as a brokerage and it does what I need it to do. They fulfill their purpose and never bother me and are great. But I also have bank account w Bank of America / Merrill lynch and I get a call from them every week from a different dillhole offering me his financial services and I find it so annoying and violating bc I know what’s happening is that these back office bungoles are looking at my accounts and holdings, which is targeting me as a good call for their prospecting.
It’s like I’m paying them to upsell me on their services, which they have never actually are able to explain why I need
Share Your Story
Have you had a negative experience with a human financial advisor or other human “financial expert”? Share your story to help others avoid similar issues. Together, we can shed light on the importance of reliable, unbiased financial advice - its been a big motivator for us to build PortfolioPilot.
Global Predictions provides investment advice only through its internet-based application, PortfolioPilot, and only to individuals who are advisory clients of Global Predictions pursuant to written advisory Client Agreements ("Advisory Services"). The publicly available portions of the Platform (i.e., the sections of the Platform that are available to individuals who are not party to a Client Agreement - including globalpredictions.com and portions of portfoliopilot.com) are provided for educational purposes only and are not intended to provide legal, tax, or financial planning advice. To the extent that any of the content published on publicly available portions of the Platform may be deemed to be investment advice, such information is impersonal and not tailored to the investment needs of any specific person. Nothing on the publicly available portions of the Platform should be construed as a solicitation or offer, or recommendation, to buy or sell any security. All charts, figures, and graphs on the publicly available websites are for illustrative purposes only. Before investing, you should consider whether any investment, investment strategy, security, other asset, or related transaction is appropriate for you based on your personal investment objectives, financial circumstances, and risk tolerance. You are also encouraged to consult your legal, tax, or investment professional regarding your specific situation. Registration does not imply a certain level of skill or training. Investing involves risk. The value of your investment will fluctuate, and you may gain or lose money.
The contents of the Platform may contain forward-looking statements that are based on management's beliefs, assumptions, current expectations, estimates, and projections about the financial industry, the economy, or Global Predictions itself. Forward-looking statements are not guarantees of the underlying expected actions or future performance and future results may differ significantly from those anticipated by the forward-looking statements. Therefore, actual results and outcomes may materially differ from what may be expressed or forecasted in such forward-looking statements.
Note: our use of the term AI refers to all artificial intelligence models used including large language models, proprietary economic models that incorporate regression or dynamic factors, and machine learning methods like supervised learning.
2. As of February 20. 2025
3. $30B Assets on Platform as of February 20. 2025. Aggregated across all plans (including the free plan). Assets on Platform represent the total value of connected and manually inputted accounts (including assets like real estate and private equity) and does not in any way represent Asset Under Management as Global Predictions does not manage any client funds.
8. Case studies presented are hypothetical scenarios and intended for illustrative purposes only. They do not represent an actual client, investment or experience, but rather are meant to provide an example of the intended investment process and methodology. An individual’s experience may vary based on his or her circumstances. There can be no assurance that the Firm will be able to achieve similar results in comparable situations. No portion of this case study is to be interpreted as a testimonial or endorsement of the Firm’s investment advisory services. The information contained herein should not be construed as personal investment advice.